Browse Topics
Tools
Editor's choice

Expats' 'underground' restaurants conquer Paris

Underground becoming all the rage.

French Employment contracts

Guiding you through the paperwork minefield.

Is Perpignan a Banana Republic?

Perpignan’s surreal smelly socks election saga.

Women expats happier at work

Expat women in Belgium and France most satisfied.

The pieces that simply will not fit

A moving piece about a 'school refuser' son.

Internaxx Stock Market
Index Last Var.(%)
BEL 20 2040.86 0.14
DAX 4708.21 -0.22
IBEX 30 9707.8 0.67
CAC 40 3119.51 0.10
FTSE 100 4236.28 0.05
AEX 253.7 0.40
DJIA 8280.74 -2.63
Nasdaq 1796.52 -2.67
FTSE MIB 18942.22 0.07
TSX Composite 10283.1 0.36
ASX 3826.6 -1.25
Hang seng 18203.4 0.14
Straits Times 0.00
ISEQ 20 433.47 0.71
You are here: Home Moving to Getting Started A guide to French etiquette
Enlarge font Decrease font Text size

23/04/2008A guide to French etiquette

The French have some very formal rules about manners and etiquette. Avoid embarrassment with this guide to the essentials.

Meeting people

The French shake hands almost whenever they meet, and always when meeting someone for the first time or for business. Arriving at work in the morning, it is quite common to greet colleagues with a handshake, and to shake hands again when leaving.

Greeting anyone familiar — like a favourite restaurant waiter or a next-door neighbour — is also usually begun with a crisp handshake.

When colleagues know each other well, and in situations between friends, women will often greet each other, and male colleagues or friends, with a kiss on the cheek. Beware - don't take the first step if you are uncertain, but be ready to embrace!

The choice of vous and tu to say "you" in French is confusing, and sometimes very subtle. But a simple rule is that the more intimate tu is only employed amongst family and friends. It is common for work colleagues to say tu, but wait until someone else does it first.

Socialising

A common way of getting to know someone is to have a drink together. But the French are not into bar binges, and an aperitif is usually sipped and stops at two.

Wine accompanies dinner and never replaces it, and a glass is filled to three-quarters, never to the brim.

Dinner guests are expected to bring a gift, however modest, and this is usually a bottle of wine, flowers, or a pre-agreed desert or cheese dish. The French keep their arms above the table, not in their lap.

Essential formalities

While people in France can sometimes appear to behave impolitely, the use of polite form in language is sacrosanct.  When addressing a stranger, always add Monsieur or Madame, as in Excusez-moi, madame if asking directions.

A typical gesture of politeness, which becomes the opposite if you don't apply it, is to let another person pass through a door first, and a man always gives way to a woman. If someone gives way to you, it is common to thank them or say pardon. Asking pardon is often a devalued term, and can be used in restrained anger, as when you move someone out of your way.

3 reactions to this article

kc posted: 10-09-2008 | 4:19 PM

Nice article - you forgot to mention that the French never ( eat with their fingers, almost never- peanuts

Kara posted: 25-06-2009 | 10:10 AM

I have worked in France for 12 years in various French and international firms and we have never shaken hands in the morning or at night when leaving the office. We do shake hands when meeting a new business partner or contact, but even when meeting a new employee, we usually just stand up and say hello and introduce ourselves but we do not necessarily shake hands.

Sara posted: 25-06-2009 | 11:48 AM

Well to be honest I have found that most French - and especially the men - are not polite. I have lived in France many years and before I was a regular visitor. Several years ago yes the French were polite, but quelle change now. I find I am constantly pushed out of the way by men in supermarkets bus ques etc.. I used to find French teenagers charming but again that seems to have changed. I find travelling on the underground in London a much better experience than the metro in Paris. Sorry to say but many seem to have become very selfish and arrogant.

Sign In
participate in the forums
ask your question
Discussion Forums

Immigration and Legal Problems

australian with british passport, by kellieanneb

Discuss French Culture

Florist - Un jour de fleurs, by gillhrdng

Immigration and Legal Problems

dual citizenship, by essomes

Immigration and Legal Problems

Working Legally In France As An EU Citizen, by papa_pingouin_

Relocation

Appeler les 08 et les numéros courts de l'étranger, by papa_pingouin_

participate in the forums

Inside Expatica
Do the recent healthcare changes affect you?

Do the recent healthcare changes affect you?

Our expert Steven Grover delves into the murky waters of French healthcare for expats and asks how recent changes affect them?

Assurance Vie - An expatriate’s guide

Assurance Vie - An expatriate’s guide

Tax and estate planning figure prominently in the list of priorities of many financially secure expatriate residents of France.

Clubs, groups and associations in France

Clubs, groups and associations in France

From Gaelic clubs to Canadian Alumni organisations, there is bound to be an English-speaking club for you in France.

Should I buy or rent in France?

Should I buy or rent in France?

This is what you need to consider when making an early choice between purchasing or renting accommodation in France.