Fri, 10 February 2012
| Index | Last | Var.(%) |
|---|---|---|
| BEL 20 | 2241.26 | -1.29 |
| DAX | 6702.22 | -1.28 |
| IBEX 30 | 8807.3 | -1.06 |
| CAC 40 | 3388.75 | -1.05 |
| FTSE 100 | 5859.39 | -0.61 |
| AEX | 321.7 | -1.05 |
| DJIA | 12890.46 | 0.05 |
| Nasdaq | 2927.23 | 0.39 |
| FTSE MIB | 16450.95 | -1.22 |
| TSX Composite | 12497.94 | -0.18 |
| ASX | 4322.6 | -0.79 |
| Hang seng | 20783.86 | -1.08 |
| Straits Times | 2960 | -0.71 |
| ISEQ 20 | 502.67 | -0.21 |
Text size
In the Garlic authors share 10 tips about surviving and loving Spain in all its diversity.MOVING to Spain is not like moving to paradise. Yes it’s sunny throughout, has beautiful beaches that run for miles and looks really pretty, but it’s also a place which can drive you wild if you don’t know it right
In the Garlic authors Valerie Collins and Theresa O'Shea share their top 10 tips about life is really lived here in Spain.
Tip 1
When dealing with any facet of Spanish bureaucracy, remember The Law of Falta Uno: that however many documents and photocopies you take along there will always be ONE missing. Always double check that you have every piece of paper that you think you might need (and possibly even a few more that you don't).
Be patient. Be assertive. Take plenty of reading material. Rope in a friendly mentor who speaks the lingo, and check any papers you are given with a fine tooth comb for names, dates, accounts numbers and more BEFORE you leave the desk or ventanilla (window). Any undiscovered glitch may set you back years. Oh, and don't forget the rabbit’s foot.
Tip 2
Do not forget to tip the butanero – the man (and it will be a man) who throws those two-ton orange gas-bottles on his shoulder and climbs four flights of stairs when the lift is broken to deliver what may well be your main source of heating and fuel.
Tip 3
If it is your birthday, don't stand around grinning, waiting for someone to buy you a drink, or bounce jauntily into work expecting to be showered with goodies. Not only do the Spanish drive on the wrong side of the road, they've also got the whole birthday thing completely wrong.
It's your birthday, it's your shout. As if it's not bad enough chalking up another year, you have to treat your colleagues and friends to boot. If it's your child's birthday, make sure he /she takes a big bag of sweets to school to share with his / her classmates.
Tip 4
Do not go to the beach in August. Three quarters of the population of Spain and their families will be there, too. Along with several kitchen sinks. You will wait nine hours to get served at a restaurant, another nine hours for the food to arrive, plus two or three more before you get fed up waiting for the bill and do a 'sinpa' (ie a runner, from sin pagar - without paying).
Tip 5
Do not pop into the bank / gestor's office / estate agent / post office / mechanic's between 9.30 and 11 in the morning. There will be a queue and one over-worked, stressed-out, don't-you-dare-complain employee will be holding the fort.
Should you wish to see a specific somebody, you can be sure said somebody will be in the nearest bar, tucking into his/ her segundo desayuno (second breakfast). If you can't beat them, join them, and order a nice large café con leche with a torpedo-sized toasted roll drizzled in oil, rubbed with tomato and stuffed with ham / cheese / tuna/ tortilla / or any combination thereof.
Tip 6
Remember, children are not only to be heard and seen. They are also to be picked up and cooed over at every possible instant, allowed to stay up as late as their parents during the summer holidays, and thought of as nothing but cute as they scream around your table while you try enjoy a quiet drink.
Tip 7
If you need to attract the barperson's attention, a polite raised finger and a timid 'Perdone' or 'Disculpe' (Excuse me) won't get you very far.
Clear your throat, along with however many decades of ingrained politeness, and yell: '¡Oiga!' (Listen, person-that-I-don't-know), or if you're really really brave, '¡Oye' (Listen, person-that-I-don't-know-but-will-speak-to-as-if-I-did).
That should do it, you'll fit right in, and no-one will mutter anything about 'manners' and 'upbringing'. Forthright and direct is ok. Just remember you can make your intonation sound polite – and smile.
Tip 8
Remember, time is relative. In Spain la mañana lasts until about 2pm, la tarde (the afternoon) stretches to nightfall, there is no word for evening, and the early hours have their own special name: la madrugada.
Tip 9
Do not attempt to buy a house, get a new kitchen put in, renew your driving licence, make an insurance claim, see a doctor, give birth etc in August. Spain is not in (It's gone to the beach. See 4).
Tip 10
Do not refer to catalan, valenciano or gallego as dialects of 'Spanish' or Castilian – unless you want to get right up the nose of a Catalan, Valenciano, Gallego big time. They are all languages in their own right, and are co-official with castellano in the autonomous communities in which they are spoken (ie Catalunya, Valencia and the Balearics, and Galicia).
In the Garlic is a quirky A-Z guide about Spain written by Valerie Collins and Theresa O'Shea. It is available from the Bookworld España chain, amazon.co.uk and all good bookshops. More information can also be found on http://www.inthegarlic.com/.
text by Valerie Collins and Theresa O'Shea
photos by Flickr contributors dougww, ilkerender and laurenatclemson
Funny post. Most is true, however just in the south of Spain. Things are different and more "european" in northern Spain
Hello Valerie Collins and Theresa O'Shea,
I just want to add to your article the fact that to find bad things about a culture or even a country is really very easy. I am spanish, I live abroad and think each country and culture has its own disadvantages, but always (and I am sure about this) many virtues.
As spanish, I felt that this article of yours is a little bit unpleasant. It only helps to feed the prejudices between cultures. I also have to say, that the british tourist usually forget his/her good manners and education at home. (I saw it where I come from, the canary islands).
With kind regards,
Mario
Hello, I'm from Spain, and I have to say that the post it's absolutely true, specially the points 1 and 9.
About the birthday comment, it's not that bad, we have the "ronda" concept, it's a good thing to invite your friends and co-workers once in a while, they do the same for you too.
Best Regards
"Not only do the Spanish drive on the wrong side of the road, they've also got the whole birthday thing completely wrong"
Really???!
This is like saying all people in the UK are always drunk. There are lots of things one can say about their experience abroad, but always have this in mind: it's YOUR experience, and it doesn't make it any more real than you think it is. If I was to believe people in England don't like showers, I wouldn't have lived there to discover the reality, which is very different. I agree some people here in Spain are not polite -at all-, but then again you can't blame the whole country. Just because the waiter in the tourist's restaurant (who's fed up of you, not-always-polite tourists) isn't nice, it doesn't mean all Spaniards are rude and communicate with each other by yelling. That's quite a narrow way of thinking. Travelling seems to wide up people's mind, so please give some example and think twice before generalizing in such a disrespectful way.
Tip 10 is stupid. Galician and Catalán are latin dialects, as Spanish, Italian of French. Not Spanish dialects.
To say that os dialects is offensive. Would I say English is a dialect from German ?
Do not many a funny topic on something serious and misunterstood.
Probablemente hables desde tu propia experiencia, pero no estoy de acuerdo con la visión general que quieres dar de España, al resto del mundo.
I'll make you one question, when do you want to go to the beach? On December? Ok, we have good better in Spain but even for us on December it's a bit cold to get undress on the beach... I agree with Mario in several things: this article it's unpleasant and usually tourists forget their good manners and education when they are in Spain. Spain is a something more than sun, beaches and beer...
Adding to 10: Do not refer to Catalan and Valencian as different languages unless you want to get right up the nose. They are the same one (Catalan, as Castilian is Spanish).
Tip 1: In germany is a lot worse
Tip 2: electrical hotplates are more often used
Tip 3: drive on the worng side of the road? Hello??? The "right" side is only in britain and australia!?? LoL
Tip 4: Some beaches from spain are normally fulled ONLY BY GERMAN AND ENGLISH people!
Tip 5: Queues ae world-wide normal and well-known
Tip 6: Children...I just think about an airplane with the children of tourists kicking the seat!!!
Tip 7: It could be possible! ;)
Tip 8: It Britain at 5 o'clock is dark!! Sometimes earlier! I understand why you think is evening for you! ;)
Hey!
About number 4, consider that plenty of those relaxing at beach are "guiris", not only Spaniards. We love beach, but outsiders love it, too!
Anyway, a very good entry. It seems some of my compatriots lack of our very typical sense of humour.
VIVA ESPANIA! jejeje
y GOD BLESS GREAT BRITAIN! ;) A very beautiful country! ;)
Antonio it is not a lack of sense of humour. It is just that the text gives a bad image of spain. And all of us know that like in Spain there is nothing!
Oh come on, it's a Joke, most of them are true at leaste here in the south of Spain xDD
Well some of them are a bit exaggerated but they're not false! And I have to agree than from the point of sight of an English person could be funny :)
It is lack of sense of humour I'm afraid. I'm spanish and I don't think this gives us a bad image... some things are true and I like them and makes our own country look different.
We could do a similar exercise with other countries and I would find it funny too. I've travelled a lot and know that nobody is perfect and that makes the world a place more interesting to see...
I think that this text is absolutely disrespectful about Spain.
Whoever wrote this text has no idea what he is talking about. Would you find it funny if I said English people are all a bunch of drunk, pale, ugly people? Oh, and Catalan and Valencian are the same language. It seems like these days anyone can write articles on the internet!
to user "Gam": is just the other way round. Valencian and Catalonian people have a strong feeling of being a Nation, so don't mix up their languages even when they look similar. Italian and Spanish sound quite similar and when written it looks "almost" the same thing. Catalonian and Valencian might be the same, but let them dream their an old kingdom with their own language. There's nothing wrong with it, and the differences in pronunciation and some words might be a reason they'd stand by when defending it. // To the rest of Spanish visitors: this might be just a joke but people might as well take it as something real. We have many other things to tell and must of them are much better and contribute to create a good image of our nice country. A country packed of visitors, which are not always polite.
Catalan is spoked on Aragón too. But this language spect is not easy, so many Valencian people say that his language is nos a Catalan dialect and consider it another language (I think it is not correct but is just to explain all points of view). It is funny to see how all our topics are collected by people of other countries... but I supose that you live on Spain is it right?
This only applies to the south, Northern Spain, communities like Asturias or the Basque Country are even more european than many center-european countries, all the irish feel like at home when they are in Asturias or Galice, bagpipes, rain, green mountains and cider. And peoples character is very different too. The North of spain is just like totally different country to visitors.
1. "Don´t rest in Spain in August". It´s full... of English Drunk People.
2. "Not only do the Spanish drive on the wrong side of the road" I don´t know if Spain it´s all the world again, like XVI Century. ALL THE WORLD drive like Spain....less english...who it´s wrong?
3. "If you need to attract the barperson's attention, a polite raised finger and a timid 'Perdone' or 'Disculpe' (Excuse me) won't get you very far" If you are english it´s better go drunk to the bar and scream "Fuckém all". You can attract all attention!! Thousands of english have done before and it works!
4. "Do not go to the beach in August. Three quarters of the population of Spain and their families will be there" Some of them working for english tourists. Spain needs a lot of people for give enought beer to english tourist (never enought)
5. "Do not attempt to buy a house, get a new kitchen put in, renew your driving licence, make an insurance claim, see a doctor, give birth etc in August. Spain is not in (It's gone to the beach. See 4)" They are giving beer to english tourists, remember.
6"When dealing with any facet of Spanish bureaucracy, remember The Law of Falta Uno" I you take a plane in the UK, rememeber The Law WE GONNA FUCK YOU AGAIN. Be patient, they always have something worst...the police can be drunk
If we take it as a funny thing, this article is real good. I just laughed a lot with it XDD Some of them are totally true ;)
But anyway,.. as a "10 point" resume of my country and people you are far from getting a thing.. First of all, take your "shower of the week" and get sober before repeating that! XDDDDD See? Topics sometimes are not too real.. ;)
PD. At least you are not locating us between Colombia and Mexico or Chile or whatever southamerican country, like most of US citizens..
Maybe the only true tip is 7. But I make it in another way, I scream "Disculpe" (Excuse me), but as if I was saying "Oye!". he word is polite, the scream not. In this way it always worked in my town.
By the way, Valencian is a dialecyt from Catalan. And Catalan and Galician are languages, as English. Do not forget about it.
And about tip 1, uhmmm, I think I agree as well.
The rest is a pure joke. I never gave a tip to a butanero.
Why do not you make another funny post about 10 things we have to know before moving to England?.
I will start:
1: Forget about sun
2: Forget about tasty and healthy food
3: People at the evening drink and fight (in this order most of the time).
4: Everybody is dressed as a Beefeater.
5: Forget about dentist and orthodontics.
6: Do not try to understand the rules of cricket.
7: They are polite, but not friendly.
8: Hooligans do not exist here, they are only brave outside.
9: They think some beers are more tasty when they are nos chilled.
10: They use hot water only for dish washing, they usually do not have a shower, they have Thames for this.
Legoles,
It's completely false that catalan is spoken in Aragon. No one in Aragon speaks it. No one.
Congratularions for an article that clearly comes from a tipical snooty, intolerant english character. Feed prejudices between people and show how uneducated and ignorant you are.... of course Spain has lacks and defects, and some of the points are true but... we could do a whole website talking about your hypocrisy, lack of hygiene(mostly those disgunsting mouths), racism, class-consciousness etc......
Catalan is not only spoken in Catalonia, Valencia and the Balearic Islands. It is spoken in Andorra, south east France, the east of Aragon and even in a Town of Sardinia.
Just to know more:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catalan_language
As an English person living in Spain, i found the article highly amusing, I think that the Spanish people who have replied don´t quite understand our typical tongue in cheek sense of humour. I think one thing the British are very good at, is being able to laugh at themselves. I recently read an article online in a British newspaper which was about the terrible behaviour of the English abroad, and i was laughing so much at it! Even though i dont conform to the usual Brit abroad, (yes i actually speak Spanish!) i was still able to recognise that yes, many of the stereotypes are true!
Lighten up Spain! learn to laugh at yourself!
Bien dicho, Andrew.
If you think that Spain has so many negative things, stay in your damm country!!! All you are is a freaking bunch of jealous ignorants!
I agree Andrew, we should learn to laugh at ourselves... If we (spaniards) don't think that Spain is better than that is when we cannot take this article as a joke.
Of course British are the best in this... see Little Britain's tv show.
catalan is not valenciano
Anda no nos deis lecciones morales de si tenemos o sentido del humor...cada uno tiene el que tiene y hay q respetarlo igual!
This article is stupid. I think you confused the country, or you had a bad experience.
Tip # 8 Past 12:00 o´clock is "la tarde", the beginning of the evening is "atardecer", the beginning of nightime is "anochecer", and the night is "la noche". The early morning hours, as you said, is "madrugada".
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Hola Spanish friends ... with respect, I think you are misunderstanding the tone of this article. Don't be so serious! There is nothing here that is negative, or meant to criticise Spain or Spanish people. It is simply a humourous description of the kind of cultural differences an English speaker would come across when living in Spain. These differences are exactly the reason why I live here, and why I love being here. So relax, take it easy, and be proud of your wonderful country. Why else do you think so many people want to come here?
totally true
and so funny!!!
i agree! the article IS funny, i AM spanish and not offended by it... what´s up with all these comments of people getting mad over the description of Spain in August?...have you ever stayed home for 3 weeks during that month?? It´s dead! have you seen the beaches on tv? I laugh at that and find it particularly amusing.
Come on! let´s laugh at ourselves. Nobody has insulted anyone!
JAJAJJAJA que bueno, I agree, this article is very funny, SPANIARDS its called sarcasim....I lived in Spain for 3 years, and I have to say sarcasim is not thier strong point, but hey thats ok, they have thier own sense of humor(not a very good one HAHA)thats why Spaniards loved me over there, they thought I was very funny!! I really don't think this was made to be rude but lets face it generalizations are made because thats what they are, generals... doesn't hold true for all but for a good amount...The good things about spain DEFINTELY trumps the bad things, thats why everybody I know that has lived or visted there, left a changed person SO TRANQUIIII PORFA!!!
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
10 things why you SHOULD NEVER move to ENGLAND:
1) England has the royal family of thorns ( la familia REAL de las espinas ) y mentidas (
Bueno se nota que sois inglesuchos....
Well... it's so curious that when English tourist come to Barcelona they forget all their good manners and it's not difficult to see those "kind and educate english people" doing their "physiological needs".
I mean... doing their physiological needs, pissing in the streets.
Espaniss: me ha encantado tu respuesta a estos dos inglesillos bastante ignorantes porque decir que catalán y vasco es un dialecto del español... vaya por Dios que lean un poco antes de decir mierda.
The Brits are the worst travelers in the world, maybe it has something to do with the food they grow up with. They go to Spain and eat in cheap Chinese restaurants, and places that advertise English Breakfasts 24 hours a day. Yuk
Funny article, a funny right view of Spain but exagerated. Little Britain could be nearly the topics of UK. All countries can have their 10 tips, and that´s why I like to travel, to discover this particular way of life in each country.
Wellcome to Spain, I hope this tips will improve your experience here ;) probably we can add another 10 tips.
I am British, I live in Spain and I think the people giving feedback here have totally missed the point. The authors have exaggerated the idiosyncrasies of Spain, in a fun, affectionate way - they haven't disrespected it. The 'wrong' side of the road - this is called IRONY!!... like so many other things they've said.
Just as so many authors have written fun things about other countries, you have to take everything with humour and a little pinch of salt not as a criticism - the authors of this probably love Spain, as I do and have lived here in malaga for ten years, which is why this article made me smile, i think I'm going to buy the book!!
Most of the Brits that I know in Spain who have lived there for 10 years and more can't say hello, goodbye or where's the bathroom in Spanish. It's a real shame, but the vast majority of them cannot assimilate even a little bit. And when in England they all make fun of the people who don't speak English. But guess what, after a year or so they all do. This almost never happens in reverse.
After doing a Spanish and French degree in London I spent a year in France, moved to Spain and have been working here, speaking Spanish and dealing with Spanish customers from day 1. My husband is also Spanish and doesn't speak English.
So now you know a Brit that breaks your mould!! To comment on what you said, I think everybody laughs, when someone makes funny mistakes in a language that isn't theirs.. i certainly know people have laughed at me lots of times, but I don't mind, as i didn't feel they were laughing at me and my effort, but my mistake. But you are right about some English people who retire to Spain and don't bother to learn spanish, there isn't an excuse - except that most of them are VERY old!!
Precisamente ésta es la respuesta que ellos esperaban. Si el artículo ha sido escrito desde el sarcasmo, decirles a estos ciudadanos ingleses que se puede hacer todo el sarcasmo del mundo sin insultar a nadie y menos a todo un país. Si España no les gusta, no vengan, así no tendremos que aguantar las borracheras de los/as señores/as ingleses/as que vienen a nuestro país a perder su tan correcta educación y compostura, y en definitiva, a mostrar cómo es en verdad el ciudadano inglés. Y el que se sienta aludido que se aguante ... es todo desde el humor sarcástico del sur de España. Hasta pronto.
Simply true...I think it´s very helpful, and those who read it have to take it as literally as possible. Things will not be taken as weardness. I only disagree with the "driving on the wrong side of the road"... Anyways..that´s another story.
Aludidos/as de este articulo - que vean la serie de comedia,'Little Britain'.Lo recomiendo, os va gustar!!
Lighten up you "I am Spanish!" readers - Look up the following in the dictionary..: "joke", "satire", "tongue-in-cheek", "chill pill" "irony" Learn to have a chuckle at yourselves now and then. In the words of Victor Borg - "A smile is the shortest distance between two people!"
I LOVE this article.
Great job Theresa and Valerie. And I HIGHLY recommend their book, "In the Garlic", it's lots of fun and a great way to learn more about Spain without falling asleep over a boring textbook.
I know both Theresa and Valerie and I can assure you all that they are probably the two most integrated foreigners I have ever met in Spain. They love this country. They both have Spanish families. They have a wonderful sense of humour and they would never try to offend anyone.
Try to enjoy and appreciate their sense of humour and you'll see how much fun the article is.
I have lived in this country for many years and I agree with every point in the article.
My dear Spanish friends, you take yourselves far too seriously. Relax. Grab a glass of wine and enjoy getting a kick out of yourselves like the rest of us do (I mean about ourselves - not only about you :)
TERE> so do Barcelona cab drivers leaving El Prat airport! My first VIEW of Spain, or should Isay Rear view of a Spaniard
To take the tread of "All the world drives like Spain" a step further (ESPANISS), you must be joking! Teh often muttered calming phrase Tranquilla! Tranquilla! applies only until the Spanish ( and we do sincerely love them all) ease themselves behind the steering wheel of a car and become Alfonso in disguise.
Okay, here we go.
A blind bend and a stream of traffic bumper to bumper in front of you. What do they do? Put their foot down and go for it and everyone else is breaking hard and holding their breath, or are pushed over onto the hard shoulder to make room for "the risk taker" to squeeze in
MAxolberrico - you have never been to Yorkshire England in the winter. It is dark at 3.30pm!
Gam - disagree. My cousin is a well educated Valenciana and does not understand Catalan at all!
Adolpho - ¡ Bravo!
Martin -read TIP 10 again and slowly. The authress´s say quite clearly they are NOT Spanish dialects, but "languages in their own rights".
By the way English is derived from many language roots sources and one of them is Old German, amongst Latin, Greek, Anglo-Saxon and even French.
Mario - My first Spanish lesson here in Tortosa I was told off as to say Pro FAvor more than once in a conversation shows signs of over-familiarity or even sarcasm. Por Favor once in a day is sufficient and poloite.
Morodo - uneducated they are not. Very distinguished Oxford Graduate no less! Whom have embraced both Catalonia and Spain and married husbands respectively from each.
They are tolerant with a humour that is so cleverly entwined in their informative and well researched book. A book everyone should have on their coffee table as it is a daily source of answers and even assists in language learning with a subtle dusting of humour to lighten the load.
Besides to do not assume that because we speak English that England is our Motherland.
You read an adverse film review but you still go to see the movie.
Likewise, read the book first! See my review on www.EbroVoice.com
Me parece que el "público objetivo" -como dicen los de mercadotecnia- de esta mirada afectuosa a algunas de las diferencias entre dos culturas (¡o más, según como se mire! Porque efectivamente, existen diferencias en España, pero también en el Reino Unido), no son los que vienen igual aquí como a cualquier sitio con sol, playa y cerveza, sino aquellos que quieren entender un poco mejor el país donde viven, piensan mudarse, tienen familia, o que han visitado o quieren conocer.
Por mi parte, en contrapartida, quiero explicar a aquellos que no lo habéis entendido que una de las reglas fundamentales de la mentalidad británica es tomarlo todo con humor, que la seriedad no está reñida con la sonrisa, ¡leñe! Un tocho pedante sólo lo leen los alumnos y colegas del autor...
Por cierto, confieso ser inglesa, afincada en España desde hace tres décadas y amiga de una de las autoras. Como podéis apreciar, he aprendido español. Existen enclaves por la costa donde a un extranjero que intenta hablar en español le contestan automáticamente en inglés (o francés, o alemán), dificultando mucho el aprendizaje del idioma. También puedo confirmar que lingüísticamente el valenciano será uno de los dialectos del catalán, pero el sentir de una mayoría de los valencianos es que existen diferencias [al menos con Barcelona] y que aquí se llama valenciano.
Discrepo en muy pocos detalles puntuales del libro, que recomiendo encarecidamente.
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Wow,I find it hard to believe that so many people were offended by these humorous
I find it hard to believe that so many people were offended by these humorous
I think the Catalans who regularly enjoy the wonderful satirical show "Polonia" would understand the humour in this article.
However, this type of humour does seem completely foreign to people outside Catalonia.
Really guys, there is no need to be so defensive about every point. The article is a humorous look at some aspects of Spain that we have all experienced to a lesser degree. It is definitely not attacking the country!
As other people here have pointed out, the British can be far more savage when looking at their own country and customs in search of a good laugh. For evidence, just watch some <b>Monty Python</b> or <b>Little Britain</b> sketches on youtube.
A lot of British humour works by exagerrating things to an extreme. This is not done to insult, but rather to elicit recognition. ("I've been there, I've done that!") None of the points made here imply that these examples are typical or even normal.
I am not advocating that those of you who were offended "lighten up", but I do plead that you should try to see that no offence was intended.
Unlike some areas of Spanish life, there are no sacred cows left in Britain now. BBC Comedy shows regularly make fun of everything from the generally terrible food (Fish
(Grrr. Got Cut off in my prime!) (Fish
Leave politics out of linguistic debates please!
I speak fluent Catalan and when I watch Valencian TV on TDT I have no problems understanding it. Whatever name you give the dialects of the language spoken on TV3 or TV7, it is undeniable that they are dialects of the same language.
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
No, tothom sap que les organitzacions academiques que decideixen la definició d'una llengua i les Generalitats de Valencia i Catalunya esten d'accord que les dues llengues son dialectes de la mateixa llengua. Qualsevol intent de negar aquesta realitat está basat en la politica, no en una veritat linguistica.
Hi Mike Quinn I agree with you but if you really have lived in Catalonia and told people who are from there that they are speaking a dialect they would have killed you by now. But, I think you are correct and that they are just jealous of the real Spaniards whose laws and armies protect them, and without them they would probably be speaking French. HOW DISGUSTING WOULD THAT BE?? !!
Hola LANGUAGE, The dialect Catalan is spoken in Catalonia, in Valencia they speak "Valenciano" another dialect of Spanish (Castellano)
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Lo se, gracias.
"Tip 3: drive on the worng side of the road? Hello??? The "right" side is only in britain and australia!?? LoL"
You display your gross ignorance,amigo, more than 60 countries drive on the left.
Hi Gina,
I like your words. I have been living in England for 20 years now. I am married to a lovely Welsh man who can speak quite good Spanish and I enjoy living here. I love Britain, warts and all.
I must confess it took me a good seven years to be able to enjoy Monty Python's sense of humour. I think we Spaniards are not very used to this type of humour in spite of Cervantes, Quevedo and all those sarcastic authours. Perhaps we got too serious in the 20th century.
Much love to you.
I was brought up in England and I came to Spain at the age of 14, to the south of Spain which to me it felt like entering "el tercer mundo" i'm talking about 26 years ago.It took me ages to get used to Spain and to consider myself spanish although i was born in Malaga.
i thought the articule very amusing, i have bought the book and i laughted through every page. it is not a critizism and those who think it is are overprotecting their country and insulting people like me who love it with its advantages and disadvantages like all countries but Spain is unique and "los giris" adore it.
I have never wanted to go back to England not even for a few days. But I sadly admit reading all these replies that some spanish just do not have a sense of humor "driving on the wrong side of the road is a JOKE" and if their is one thing that we spanish are good at is telling a joke, whats wrong about receiving one?
Well said.
I am not surprised by the article, you know... usual english thinking, some things never change.. ;p
Ah... by the way, I would add another point. Number 11: (absolutely true).
Spaniards are always arguing between the different regions, if the north is better than the south and the different languages...
Lo siento, pero sea de lo que sea el foro, siempre lo mismo, ya cansa.. Saludos
I lived in Madrid for fifteen years. I think the article is quite accurate; however, I would amend point 8 to read that "la tarde" begins after you've had lunch (la comida). It varies somewhat from person to person. And you must appreciate that the spirit of the article is to inform with humor, not ridicule the Spaniard. I think most Spaniards, especially those who can defend themselves in English, will get this. And just as it has been said that "who is ignorant of another language is ignorant of his own [language]" I think that extends to knowledge of another country. If you've never left your own country, your understanding of it will be somewhat limited. You can no more understand Britain or the United States from its cinema than you can understand Spain from watching Almodovar's movies. And, in any case, it takes time to learn all of the idiosyncrasies of a land and its people and its customs.
Silly Spaniards, taking life a little less seriously having 2nd breakfasts and stopping working in the brutal heat of August. I think my employees should be chained to their desks but the silly labour inspector told me that was illegal.
I mean really, how lazy must they be having siestas and things in the 40 degree heat, you'd almost think that they were Arabs. Can you imagine, I have actually seen people have a glass of wine or beer at around 12pm and then head back to work!? Lazy alcoholics they must be, playing with children even! They should see mine, working in the basement producing garments after school. Imagine taking them outside!? Next thing they'll have me doing is feeding them more than once a day!
In the same spirit as the article, I will now be taking my tongue out of cheek before I am roasted alive by comments.
Enjoy life
http://troyshouse.blogspot.com
Whats wrong with you people, why so sensitive? This article is written using british/irish humour, and is laughing more at ourselves than at the Spanish!
Its not supposed to be taken literally as a racial slander. How did we ever all become EU citizens with this overreaction to a comic portrayal of UK expectations in a foreign country?
Every culture has good and bad things. I found the way things were written not in a very nice way especially the part of driving on the wrong side and the comment about kids.
I think British should stay on their cold island called UK
I think every person who has criticized this article should go live in the UK. You would see this IS the way Brits joke! There is no offense in any word whatsoever.
You might not like the style it's written in(I don't), but the contents are as they would be if the Brits were talking about themselves, and it's funny! Brits are the masters of sarcasm. People have reacted to this article like extremists. Someone earlier on made a good point: you can only be offended if you really think you're not better than that.
Btw, I have lived 10 years in Eastern Europe, 15 in Spain and a very amazing 2 in the UK, where I hope to go back soon, and there is a percentage of people in Spain who take these things worryingly seriously. Stop telling everybody "go back to your country" and realize that every single one of these points makes Spain what it is: amazing. It's reactions like yours that spoil it for all the rest of us, who take this as a compliment to our country. Viva España y el Reino Unido, con su lluvia y todo ;)
Troy, you're a legend.LOL
I think the article was made, 'tongue in cheek' - that's a British expression for saying that although it has a base of truth in it, it was meant to be taken in a humorous and affectionate way.
..............................................
www.spanishlanguagesite.com/blog
Come on...Why do we, Spaniards, have to take ourselves that seriously and be so sensitive. It is obvious that the authors wrote this book in good spirit or else they would not being living in Spain for as long as they have.
I have been in the UK and I feel sorry for you, if you think that Spain is like you say, you must go back to your country right away,you will never be happy here, you can't be that bored in Spain and the heat might get you,you must miss the rain,so go back to you country and let us leave our way.This a not a to be taking humorous.
i think you all are just a bunch of idiots that havent got anything to do.
I am from Spain I find this humorous and true.
Take a chill pill people, it is an opinion- don't be so offended. We all make fun of something and if you can take humor go and read Nietche.
From the reactions i see from some of the Spanish people on this article, it kind of reaffirm what i read from an article before this, that Spanish people can't take criticsm, take things personally, and emotional. Well, there's nothing wrong with this of course, it's just a choice of how they choose to perceive things. Anyway, openness to outsider's perspective could be beneficial though, for improvement at least.
Hi:
I think that English people are prone to making stereotypes about Spain in that same superficial way Spanish people do about the rest of the world. Funny thing, but the English have many things in common with the Spanish, and coming from an Italian, this is interesting and strangely impartial. What do they have in common?
1.they both love beer, yes one likes it hot the other cold, but the essence is the same. (how strangely germanic of the Spaniards, eh? They are the only 'mediterraneans' who could outdrink a british person)
2.they both love everything fried, fried fried (healthy food? I don't see it here in Spain or in the UK, honestly!) Pescaito, fish and chips, one face one race (sorry guys)
3 they both (English and Spanish) get angry if you cut in line or if you do not serve them immediately (check out Spaniards or British in Italy, boy do they get nervous with our italian ways, you guys are sooo impatient!!! Not everything is quick tapas and beer pints and efficiency my friends!)
4 cannot have fun without drinking! Go see the Spanish in Lavapies in Madrid, pissing the night away, or the Brits along the coast...hmmm there might be a reason they come here...common drinking culture perhaps?
5 Spaniards and British love meat, that is all they eat in fact. Of course, in Spain it is a little better.
6 Both are supremely nationalistic, in that funny way, sensitive and pissy (example, Catalonians and Scottish, Welsh and Basque....hahha wow, SOOO different, I thought they were different species--->sarcastic voice here) etc... You are all Brits and Spanish to the rest of the world, despite such "IMMENSE" (hahahaha) differences between these regions.
7 both Brits and Spaniards are heirs to long, lost, dead colonies and empires, oh wait! The Spaniards complain about Gibraltar...and the Moroccans complain about Melilla and Ceuta. I think everyone has a point: if you want people to leave your country, leave others' alone too! Sad ex-colonizers, now only live on past glories. hahah. Look at who you are now.
8 both Spain and Britain were part of the Roman empire, who not only taught both of you barbarians how to read, write (we are using the latin alphabet as we speak), but also how to build roads, aqueducts, baths (although some use them more than others, ha!), and law. The list of course could go on. Come to Italy, silly English and Spanish, stop eating fried foods and drinking pints and cañas, and learn about your origins for once! You are two faces of the same coin, Spain and England, and the fact that you are so antagonistic proves it to me.
I could go on but my hand is tired and this is silly enough. Everyone needs to take a chill pill, and when you people write a book about stereotypes, look at yourselves and then write. Also, think about the larger context and you will find out that you are SOOOO alike, it's not even funny!
the moral of the story to these dear Spanglo-Brit-Spaniards (same thing): GROW UP!
You are both so envious of each other, for different reasons.
Grazie e arrivederci
As an American (okay, norteamericano...) I have to say I am pleased to see that PC (politically correct) attitudes are becoming universal. How did we ever manage to get along before?!
So much negative reaction to this funny advice article! To you Spaniards who find this article offensive, I would say, chill-out!. The British are masters of self-deprecating ironic humor (aka humour) and unless you understand the subtilties of their manner of speaking, you won't get it. Even Americans often have trouble "getting it" when some Brit cracks wise.
You also hve to understand the English never like anybody in general but every one specifically. If you ask them about the Americans, the French (okay bad choice) the Spanish, the Scots, the Germans...yada, yada, yada, they will hrump and say something under their breath, yet, they never met one they didn't like. Despite themselves, they really like other cultures and people.
this didnt help at all!
!!BENVINGUTS A CATALUNYA!!!BIENVENIDOS A ESPAÑA!!
i like balls
you have also forgotten the racism here against enybody whos not spanish. I have lived here now 9 years i came when i was 12 and from the first day in school i was called ingles de mierda (english shit) until i did some thing about it. and for those 9 years i have seen the way they have insulted black or halfcast people calling them negros de mierda o negratas (black shit or nigga) with indifference of where they were from it was there skin color. foreigners even better that means they can insult you with out you even noticing and ive seen it more than a hundred times and this is throughout spain.
i love spain i love the people but the majority of people here a racist and always will be look at what the americans had as a warning when coming to spain that there racist. but they took that down when Michelle Obama went to marbella on holiday.
me encanta españa y ablo perfecta mente el castellano si alguien kiere contestarme en español.
Is it possible to cheat on taxes in Spain and how?
Am forigner who spent several years in Spain
Soy de Sevilla, pero he pasado los uttimos 5 años en Francia. Ahora me dirijo a Canterbury para estudiar durante un año, y quien sabe, si me gusta me quede por una temporada. Yendo al grano, creo que tendemos a tomarnos las bromas sobre "nosotros" demasiado personales. Debemos aprender a reirnos con este tipo de chistes, pues en definitiva estan hechos para eso.
Hola Kim
"me encanta españa y ablo perfecta mente el castellano si alguien kiere contestarme en español"
Ahora que "ablas" el catellano "perfecta mente" aprende a escribir si "kieres"
Good evening: BUENAS TARDES
Well said but you forgot a couple: 1) Always smile and say hello this is not England people are friendly, well they are here 2) Remember why you came here. But seriously the above is a good assessment of how things are. Make Spanish friends and you will be fine and have a lot of laughs. However, remember this is their country and their customs join in and enjoy or stay outside and be miserable the choice is yours.
Oh yes and I forgot. Espaniss! Not all the English are like that IF you look beyond the drunks you will find a lot like us. Retired here because we LIKE the people, we LIKE Spain, but more important, at least to us we are away from the sort of people you talk about. I am retired and an author and here in Catalunia I have found peace to write, live and relax the basic truth is this: if you abide by the laws of the country that is fine, if you do not like their customs dont attend them or leave. It is that simple, but remember there are good and bad sides to ALL countries, so please do not judge us all along the lines you have set out.
I hugely enjoyed the 10 comments and having lived here for 8 years, agree with every word and more! Well said and well done!
I adore Spain. I go whenever I can. But one of the reasons I left was due to
1Everyone shouting - especially kids with their parents doing nothng to make them be quieter
2Pickpockets in Barcelona (but thats for another day)
but mainly 3 everyone being so into their region / country and habits...
and People getting so angry about silly details like the obviously oversimplified tongue in cheek comment to start here. I was always amazed why it was important to so many Spaniards what we thought of them! Por que molesta tanto que hay gente que piensa que los espanoles son todos toros y flamenco..? Por que importa??
Anyway very happy in France but do miss Spain every day..
I LOVE THIS - bold and so true.
But one thing is for sure, the wonderful women you meet in Spain will positively mark your life and heart - and will be your friend forever. I only llived there a little over 2yrs, have been gone about 18 months, and it feels like yesterday. Not moment passes that, despite all the above, when I don't wish that I was living right back there on Plaza de las Cortes 3! XOXO, Suzette in Wash DC/VA. ;-) suzette.manduley@gmail.com
Hector was very right.
1.English drive on a wrong side.
2.Their food is made for premature death from cholesterol.
3.Weather is s....
4.People are slow,non puctual,liars.
5.For some reason germans dosent want to stay in hotels where english are staying:)
As an Irish person with a very good friend from Spain, I can say he would definitely see the funny side of this article. If the authors had said "Spain is perfect in every way - the end" no one would believe it. Only countries like North Korea make statements like this.
this is a guide to liing on the coast as a fat lazy babyboomer with al the money and time in the world. If you don't scratc below the surface you will never understand a different way of life. FIRSTLY, has it ever occured to the british that mayby THEY are the odd ones out?...mmm??....the bit aout noisy children saidit all really. why do the british have children if they find them annoying? why not just clone yourselves in labs? the idea that the spanish are a seperate race could only be dreamed up by flag waving little-englanders. WE are ALL ...EUROPEANS. end of. Its just that the british are "odd".
it sound the same as living in miami.
Funny post. Most is true, however just in the south of Spain. Things are different and more "european" in northern Spain
Hello Valerie Collins and Theresa O'Shea,
I just want to add to your article the fact that to find bad things about a culture or even a country is really very easy. I am spanish, I live abroad and think each country and culture has its own disadvantages, but always (and I am sure about this) many virtues.
As spanish, I felt that this article of yours is a little bit unpleasant. It only helps to feed the prejudices between cultures. I also have to say, that the british tourist usually forget his/her good manners and education at home. (I saw it where I come from, the canary islands).
With kind regards,
Mario
Hello, I'm from Spain, and I have to say that the post it's absolutely true, specially the points 1 and 9.
About the birthday comment, it's not that bad, we have the "ronda" concept, it's a good thing to invite your friends and co-workers once in a while, they do the same for you too.
Best Regards
"Not only do the Spanish drive on the wrong side of the road, they've also got the whole birthday thing completely wrong"
Really???!
This is like saying all people in the UK are always drunk. There are lots of things one can say about their experience abroad, but always have this in mind: it's YOUR experience, and it doesn't make it any more real than you think it is. If I was to believe people in England don't like showers, I wouldn't have lived there to discover the reality, which is very different. I agree some people here in Spain are not polite -at all-, but then again you can't blame the whole country. Just because the waiter in the tourist's restaurant (who's fed up of you, not-always-polite tourists) isn't nice, it doesn't mean all Spaniards are rude and communicate with each other by yelling. That's quite a narrow way of thinking. Travelling seems to wide up people's mind, so please give some example and think twice before generalizing in such a disrespectful way.
Tip 10 is stupid. Galician and Catalán are latin dialects, as Spanish, Italian of French. Not Spanish dialects.
To say that os dialects is offensive. Would I say English is a dialect from German ?
Do not many a funny topic on something serious and misunterstood.
Probablemente hables desde tu propia experiencia, pero no estoy de acuerdo con la visión general que quieres dar de España, al resto del mundo.
I'll make you one question, when do you want to go to the beach? On December? Ok, we have good better in Spain but even for us on December it's a bit cold to get undress on the beach... I agree with Mario in several things: this article it's unpleasant and usually tourists forget their good manners and education when they are in Spain. Spain is a something more than sun, beaches and beer...
Adding to 10: Do not refer to Catalan and Valencian as different languages unless you want to get right up the nose. They are the same one (Catalan, as Castilian is Spanish).
Tip 1: In germany is a lot worse
Tip 2: electrical hotplates are more often used
Tip 3: drive on the worng side of the road? Hello??? The "right" side is only in britain and australia!?? LoL
Tip 4: Some beaches from spain are normally fulled ONLY BY GERMAN AND ENGLISH people!
Tip 5: Queues ae world-wide normal and well-known
Tip 6: Children...I just think about an airplane with the children of tourists kicking the seat!!!
Tip 7: It could be possible! ;)
Tip 8: It Britain at 5 o'clock is dark!! Sometimes earlier! I understand why you think is evening for you! ;)
Hey!
About number 4, consider that plenty of those relaxing at beach are "guiris", not only Spaniards. We love beach, but outsiders love it, too!
Anyway, a very good entry. It seems some of my compatriots lack of our very typical sense of humour.
VIVA ESPANIA! jejeje
y GOD BLESS GREAT BRITAIN! ;) A very beautiful country! ;)
Antonio it is not a lack of sense of humour. It is just that the text gives a bad image of spain. And all of us know that like in Spain there is nothing!
Oh come on, it's a Joke, most of them are true at leaste here in the south of Spain xDD
Well some of them are a bit exaggerated but they're not false! And I have to agree than from the point of sight of an English person could be funny :)
It is lack of sense of humour I'm afraid. I'm spanish and I don't think this gives us a bad image... some things are true and I like them and makes our own country look different.
We could do a similar exercise with other countries and I would find it funny too. I've travelled a lot and know that nobody is perfect and that makes the world a place more interesting to see...
I think that this text is absolutely disrespectful about Spain.
Whoever wrote this text has no idea what he is talking about. Would you find it funny if I said English people are all a bunch of drunk, pale, ugly people? Oh, and Catalan and Valencian are the same language. It seems like these days anyone can write articles on the internet!
to user "Gam": is just the other way round. Valencian and Catalonian people have a strong feeling of being a Nation, so don't mix up their languages even when they look similar. Italian and Spanish sound quite similar and when written it looks "almost" the same thing. Catalonian and Valencian might be the same, but let them dream their an old kingdom with their own language. There's nothing wrong with it, and the differences in pronunciation and some words might be a reason they'd stand by when defending it. // To the rest of Spanish visitors: this might be just a joke but people might as well take it as something real. We have many other things to tell and must of them are much better and contribute to create a good image of our nice country. A country packed of visitors, which are not always polite.
Catalan is spoked on Aragón too. But this language spect is not easy, so many Valencian people say that his language is nos a Catalan dialect and consider it another language (I think it is not correct but is just to explain all points of view). It is funny to see how all our topics are collected by people of other countries... but I supose that you live on Spain is it right?
This only applies to the south, Northern Spain, communities like Asturias or the Basque Country are even more european than many center-european countries, all the irish feel like at home when they are in Asturias or Galice, bagpipes, rain, green mountains and cider. And peoples character is very different too. The North of spain is just like totally different country to visitors.
1. "Don´t rest in Spain in August". It´s full... of English Drunk People.
2. "Not only do the Spanish drive on the wrong side of the road" I don´t know if Spain it´s all the world again, like XVI Century. ALL THE WORLD drive like Spain....less english...who it´s wrong?
3. "If you need to attract the barperson's attention, a polite raised finger and a timid 'Perdone' or 'Disculpe' (Excuse me) won't get you very far" If you are english it´s better go drunk to the bar and scream "Fuckém all". You can attract all attention!! Thousands of english have done before and it works!
4. "Do not go to the beach in August. Three quarters of the population of Spain and their families will be there" Some of them working for english tourists. Spain needs a lot of people for give enought beer to english tourist (never enought)
5. "Do not attempt to buy a house, get a new kitchen put in, renew your driving licence, make an insurance claim, see a doctor, give birth etc in August. Spain is not in (It's gone to the beach. See 4)" They are giving beer to english tourists, remember.
6"When dealing with any facet of Spanish bureaucracy, remember The Law of Falta Uno" I you take a plane in the UK, rememeber The Law WE GONNA FUCK YOU AGAIN. Be patient, they always have something worst...the police can be drunk
If we take it as a funny thing, this article is real good. I just laughed a lot with it XDD Some of them are totally true ;)
But anyway,.. as a "10 point" resume of my country and people you are far from getting a thing.. First of all, take your "shower of the week" and get sober before repeating that! XDDDDD See? Topics sometimes are not too real.. ;)
PD. At least you are not locating us between Colombia and Mexico or Chile or whatever southamerican country, like most of US citizens..
Maybe the only true tip is 7. But I make it in another way, I scream "Disculpe" (Excuse me), but as if I was saying "Oye!". he word is polite, the scream not. In this way it always worked in my town.
By the way, Valencian is a dialecyt from Catalan. And Catalan and Galician are languages, as English. Do not forget about it.
And about tip 1, uhmmm, I think I agree as well.
The rest is a pure joke. I never gave a tip to a butanero.
Why do not you make another funny post about 10 things we have to know before moving to England?.
I will start:
1: Forget about sun
2: Forget about tasty and healthy food
3: People at the evening drink and fight (in this order most of the time).
4: Everybody is dressed as a Beefeater.
5: Forget about dentist and orthodontics.
6: Do not try to understand the rules of cricket.
7: They are polite, but not friendly.
8: Hooligans do not exist here, they are only brave outside.
9: They think some beers are more tasty when they are nos chilled.
10: They use hot water only for dish washing, they usually do not have a shower, they have Thames for this.
Legoles,
It's completely false that catalan is spoken in Aragon. No one in Aragon speaks it. No one.
Congratularions for an article that clearly comes from a tipical snooty, intolerant english character. Feed prejudices between people and show how uneducated and ignorant you are.... of course Spain has lacks and defects, and some of the points are true but... we could do a whole website talking about your hypocrisy, lack of hygiene(mostly those disgunsting mouths), racism, class-consciousness etc......
Catalan is not only spoken in Catalonia, Valencia and the Balearic Islands. It is spoken in Andorra, south east France, the east of Aragon and even in a Town of Sardinia.
Just to know more:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Catalan_language
As an English person living in Spain, i found the article highly amusing, I think that the Spanish people who have replied don´t quite understand our typical tongue in cheek sense of humour. I think one thing the British are very good at, is being able to laugh at themselves. I recently read an article online in a British newspaper which was about the terrible behaviour of the English abroad, and i was laughing so much at it! Even though i dont conform to the usual Brit abroad, (yes i actually speak Spanish!) i was still able to recognise that yes, many of the stereotypes are true!
Lighten up Spain! learn to laugh at yourself!
Bien dicho, Andrew.
If you think that Spain has so many negative things, stay in your damm country!!! All you are is a freaking bunch of jealous ignorants!
I agree Andrew, we should learn to laugh at ourselves... If we (spaniards) don't think that Spain is better than that is when we cannot take this article as a joke.
Of course British are the best in this... see Little Britain's tv show.
catalan is not valenciano
Anda no nos deis lecciones morales de si tenemos o sentido del humor...cada uno tiene el que tiene y hay q respetarlo igual!
This article is stupid. I think you confused the country, or you had a bad experience.
Tip # 8 Past 12:00 o´clock is "la tarde", the beginning of the evening is "atardecer", the beginning of nightime is "anochecer", and the night is "la noche". The early morning hours, as you said, is "madrugada".
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Hola Spanish friends ... with respect, I think you are misunderstanding the tone of this article. Don't be so serious! There is nothing here that is negative, or meant to criticise Spain or Spanish people. It is simply a humourous description of the kind of cultural differences an English speaker would come across when living in Spain. These differences are exactly the reason why I live here, and why I love being here. So relax, take it easy, and be proud of your wonderful country. Why else do you think so many people want to come here?
totally true
and so funny!!!
i agree! the article IS funny, i AM spanish and not offended by it... what´s up with all these comments of people getting mad over the description of Spain in August?...have you ever stayed home for 3 weeks during that month?? It´s dead! have you seen the beaches on tv? I laugh at that and find it particularly amusing.
Come on! let´s laugh at ourselves. Nobody has insulted anyone!
JAJAJJAJA que bueno, I agree, this article is very funny, SPANIARDS its called sarcasim....I lived in Spain for 3 years, and I have to say sarcasim is not thier strong point, but hey thats ok, they have thier own sense of humor(not a very good one HAHA)thats why Spaniards loved me over there, they thought I was very funny!! I really don't think this was made to be rude but lets face it generalizations are made because thats what they are, generals... doesn't hold true for all but for a good amount...The good things about spain DEFINTELY trumps the bad things, thats why everybody I know that has lived or visted there, left a changed person SO TRANQUIIII PORFA!!!
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
You are the typical english person that is so jealous of spanish people that you can't stander,I pet that you are fat and ugly.
10 things why you SHOULD NEVER move to ENGLAND:
1) England has the royal family of thorns ( la familia REAL de las espinas ) y mentidas (
Bueno se nota que sois inglesuchos....
Well... it's so curious that when English tourist come to Barcelona they forget all their good manners and it's not difficult to see those "kind and educate english people" doing their "physiological needs".
I mean... doing their physiological needs, pissing in the streets.
Espaniss: me ha encantado tu respuesta a estos dos inglesillos bastante ignorantes porque decir que catalán y vasco es un dialecto del español... vaya por Dios que lean un poco antes de decir mierda.
The Brits are the worst travelers in the world, maybe it has something to do with the food they grow up with. They go to Spain and eat in cheap Chinese restaurants, and places that advertise English Breakfasts 24 hours a day. Yuk
Funny article, a funny right view of Spain but exagerated. Little Britain could be nearly the topics of UK. All countries can have their 10 tips, and that´s why I like to travel, to discover this particular way of life in each country.
Wellcome to Spain, I hope this tips will improve your experience here ;) probably we can add another 10 tips.
I am British, I live in Spain and I think the people giving feedback here have totally missed the point. The authors have exaggerated the idiosyncrasies of Spain, in a fun, affectionate way - they haven't disrespected it. The 'wrong' side of the road - this is called IRONY!!... like so many other things they've said.
Just as so many authors have written fun things about other countries, you have to take everything with humour and a little pinch of salt not as a criticism - the authors of this probably love Spain, as I do and have lived here in malaga for ten years, which is why this article made me smile, i think I'm going to buy the book!!
Most of the Brits that I know in Spain who have lived there for 10 years and more can't say hello, goodbye or where's the bathroom in Spanish. It's a real shame, but the vast majority of them cannot assimilate even a little bit. And when in England they all make fun of the people who don't speak English. But guess what, after a year or so they all do. This almost never happens in reverse.
After doing a Spanish and French degree in London I spent a year in France, moved to Spain and have been working here, speaking Spanish and dealing with Spanish customers from day 1. My husband is also Spanish and doesn't speak English.
So now you know a Brit that breaks your mould!! To comment on what you said, I think everybody laughs, when someone makes funny mistakes in a language that isn't theirs.. i certainly know people have laughed at me lots of times, but I don't mind, as i didn't feel they were laughing at me and my effort, but my mistake. But you are right about some English people who retire to Spain and don't bother to learn spanish, there isn't an excuse - except that most of them are VERY old!!
Precisamente ésta es la respuesta que ellos esperaban. Si el artículo ha sido escrito desde el sarcasmo, decirles a estos ciudadanos ingleses que se puede hacer todo el sarcasmo del mundo sin insultar a nadie y menos a todo un país. Si España no les gusta, no vengan, así no tendremos que aguantar las borracheras de los/as señores/as ingleses/as que vienen a nuestro país a perder su tan correcta educación y compostura, y en definitiva, a mostrar cómo es en verdad el ciudadano inglés. Y el que se sienta aludido que se aguante ... es todo desde el humor sarcástico del sur de España. Hasta pronto.
Simply true...I think it´s very helpful, and those who read it have to take it as literally as possible. Things will not be taken as weardness. I only disagree with the "driving on the wrong side of the road"... Anyways..that´s another story.
Aludidos/as de este articulo - que vean la serie de comedia,'Little Britain'.Lo recomiendo, os va gustar!!
Lighten up you "I am Spanish!" readers - Look up the following in the dictionary..: "joke", "satire", "tongue-in-cheek", "chill pill" "irony" Learn to have a chuckle at yourselves now and then. In the words of Victor Borg - "A smile is the shortest distance between two people!"
I LOVE this article.
Great job Theresa and Valerie. And I HIGHLY recommend their book, "In the Garlic", it's lots of fun and a great way to learn more about Spain without falling asleep over a boring textbook.
I know both Theresa and Valerie and I can assure you all that they are probably the two most integrated foreigners I have ever met in Spain. They love this country. They both have Spanish families. They have a wonderful sense of humour and they would never try to offend anyone.
Try to enjoy and appreciate their sense of humour and you'll see how much fun the article is.
I have lived in this country for many years and I agree with every point in the article.
My dear Spanish friends, you take yourselves far too seriously. Relax. Grab a glass of wine and enjoy getting a kick out of yourselves like the rest of us do (I mean about ourselves - not only about you :)
TERE> so do Barcelona cab drivers leaving El Prat airport! My first VIEW of Spain, or should Isay Rear view of a Spaniard
To take the tread of "All the world drives like Spain" a step further (ESPANISS), you must be joking! Teh often muttered calming phrase Tranquilla! Tranquilla! applies only until the Spanish ( and we do sincerely love them all) ease themselves behind the steering wheel of a car and become Alfonso in disguise.
Okay, here we go.
A blind bend and a stream of traffic bumper to bumper in front of you. What do they do? Put their foot down and go for it and everyone else is breaking hard and holding their breath, or are pushed over onto the hard shoulder to make room for "the risk taker" to squeeze in
MAxolberrico - you have never been to Yorkshire England in the winter. It is dark at 3.30pm!
Gam - disagree. My cousin is a well educated Valenciana and does not understand Catalan at all!
Adolpho - ¡ Bravo!
Martin -read TIP 10 again and slowly. The authress´s say quite clearly they are NOT Spanish dialects, but "languages in their own rights".
By the way English is derived from many language roots sources and one of them is Old German, amongst Latin, Greek, Anglo-Saxon and even French.
Mario - My first Spanish lesson here in Tortosa I was told off as to say Pro FAvor more than once in a conversation shows signs of over-familiarity or even sarcasm. Por Favor once in a day is sufficient and poloite.
Morodo - uneducated they are not. Very distinguished Oxford Graduate no less! Whom have embraced both Catalonia and Spain and married husbands respectively from each.
They are tolerant with a humour that is so cleverly entwined in their informative and well researched book. A book everyone should have on their coffee table as it is a daily source of answers and even assists in language learning with a subtle dusting of humour to lighten the load.
Besides to do not assume that because we speak English that England is our Motherland.
You read an adverse film review but you still go to see the movie.
Likewise, read the book first! See my review on www.EbroVoice.com
Me parece que el "público objetivo" -como dicen los de mercadotecnia- de esta mirada afectuosa a algunas de las diferencias entre dos culturas (¡o más, según como se mire! Porque efectivamente, existen diferencias en España, pero también en el Reino Unido), no son los que vienen igual aquí como a cualquier sitio con sol, playa y cerveza, sino aquellos que quieren entender un poco mejor el país donde viven, piensan mudarse, tienen familia, o que han visitado o quieren conocer.
Por mi parte, en contrapartida, quiero explicar a aquellos que no lo habéis entendido que una de las reglas fundamentales de la mentalidad británica es tomarlo todo con humor, que la seriedad no está reñida con la sonrisa, ¡leñe! Un tocho pedante sólo lo leen los alumnos y colegas del autor...
Por cierto, confieso ser inglesa, afincada en España desde hace tres décadas y amiga de una de las autoras. Como podéis apreciar, he aprendido español. Existen enclaves por la costa donde a un extranjero que intenta hablar en español le contestan automáticamente en inglés (o francés, o alemán), dificultando mucho el aprendizaje del idioma. También puedo confirmar que lingüísticamente el valenciano será uno de los dialectos del catalán, pero el sentir de una mayoría de los valencianos es que existen diferencias [al menos con Barcelona] y que aquí se llama valenciano.
Discrepo en muy pocos detalles puntuales del libro, que recomiendo encarecidamente.
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Wow,I find it hard to believe that so many people were offended by these humorous
I find it hard to believe that so many people were offended by these humorous
I think the Catalans who regularly enjoy the wonderful satirical show "Polonia" would understand the humour in this article.
However, this type of humour does seem completely foreign to people outside Catalonia.
Really guys, there is no need to be so defensive about every point. The article is a humorous look at some aspects of Spain that we have all experienced to a lesser degree. It is definitely not attacking the country!
As other people here have pointed out, the British can be far more savage when looking at their own country and customs in search of a good laugh. For evidence, just watch some <b>Monty Python</b> or <b>Little Britain</b> sketches on youtube.
A lot of British humour works by exagerrating things to an extreme. This is not done to insult, but rather to elicit recognition. ("I've been there, I've done that!") None of the points made here imply that these examples are typical or even normal.
I am not advocating that those of you who were offended "lighten up", but I do plead that you should try to see that no offence was intended.
Unlike some areas of Spanish life, there are no sacred cows left in Britain now. BBC Comedy shows regularly make fun of everything from the generally terrible food (Fish
(Grrr. Got Cut off in my prime!) (Fish
Leave politics out of linguistic debates please!
I speak fluent Catalan and when I watch Valencian TV on TDT I have no problems understanding it. Whatever name you give the dialects of the language spoken on TV3 or TV7, it is undeniable that they are dialects of the same language.
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
No, tothom sap que les organitzacions academiques que decideixen la definició d'una llengua i les Generalitats de Valencia i Catalunya esten d'accord que les dues llengues son dialectes de la mateixa llengua. Qualsevol intent de negar aquesta realitat está basat en la politica, no en una veritat linguistica.
Hi Mike Quinn I agree with you but if you really have lived in Catalonia and told people who are from there that they are speaking a dialect they would have killed you by now. But, I think you are correct and that they are just jealous of the real Spaniards whose laws and armies protect them, and without them they would probably be speaking French. HOW DISGUSTING WOULD THAT BE?? !!
Hola LANGUAGE, The dialect Catalan is spoken in Catalonia, in Valencia they speak "Valenciano" another dialect of Spanish (Castellano)
Todo el mundo sabe que el idioma Valenciano no es catalán.
Lo se, gracias.
"Tip 3: drive on the worng side of the road? Hello??? The "right" side is only in britain and australia!?? LoL"
You display your gross ignorance,amigo, more than 60 countries drive on the left.
Hi Gina,
I like your words. I have been living in England for 20 years now. I am married to a lovely Welsh man who can speak quite good Spanish and I enjoy living here. I love Britain, warts and all.
I must confess it took me a good seven years to be able to enjoy Monty Python's sense of humour. I think we Spaniards are not very used to this type of humour in spite of Cervantes, Quevedo and all those sarcastic authours. Perhaps we got too serious in the 20th century.
Much love to you.
I was brought up in England and I came to Spain at the age of 14, to the south of Spain which to me it felt like entering "el tercer mundo" i'm talking about 26 years ago.It took me ages to get used to Spain and to consider myself spanish although i was born in Malaga.
i thought the articule very amusing, i have bought the book and i laughted through every page. it is not a critizism and those who think it is are overprotecting their country and insulting people like me who love it with its advantages and disadvantages like all countries but Spain is unique and "los giris" adore it.
I have never wanted to go back to England not even for a few days. But I sadly admit reading all these replies that some spanish just do not have a sense of humor "driving on the wrong side of the road is a JOKE" and if their is one thing that we spanish are good at is telling a joke, whats wrong about receiving one?
Well said.
I am not surprised by the article, you know... usual english thinking, some things never change.. ;p
Ah... by the way, I would add another point. Number 11: (absolutely true).
Spaniards are always arguing between the different regions, if the north is better than the south and the different languages...
Lo siento, pero sea de lo que sea el foro, siempre lo mismo, ya cansa.. Saludos
I lived in Madrid for fifteen years. I think the article is quite accurate; however, I would amend point 8 to read that "la tarde" begins after you've had lunch (la comida). It varies somewhat from person to person. And you must appreciate that the spirit of the article is to inform with humor, not ridicule the Spaniard. I think most Spaniards, especially those who can defend themselves in English, will get this. And just as it has been said that "who is ignorant of another language is ignorant of his own [language]" I think that extends to knowledge of another country. If you've never left your own country, your understanding of it will be somewhat limited. You can no more understand Britain or the United States from its cinema than you can understand Spain from watching Almodovar's movies. And, in any case, it takes time to learn all of the idiosyncrasies of a land and its people and its customs.
Silly Spaniards, taking life a little less seriously having 2nd breakfasts and stopping working in the brutal heat of August. I think my employees should be chained to their desks but the silly labour inspector told me that was illegal.
I mean really, how lazy must they be having siestas and things in the 40 degree heat, you'd almost think that they were Arabs. Can you imagine, I have actually seen people have a glass of wine or beer at around 12pm and then head back to work!? Lazy alcoholics they must be, playing with children even! They should see mine, working in the basement producing garments after school. Imagine taking them outside!? Next thing they'll have me doing is feeding them more than once a day!
In the same spirit as the article, I will now be taking my tongue out of cheek before I am roasted alive by comments.
Enjoy life
http://troyshouse.blogspot.com
Whats wrong with you people, why so sensitive? This article is written using british/irish humour, and is laughing more at ourselves than at the Spanish!
Its not supposed to be taken literally as a racial slander. How did we ever all become EU citizens with this overreaction to a comic portrayal of UK expectations in a foreign country?
Every culture has good and bad things. I found the way things were written not in a very nice way especially the part of driving on the wrong side and the comment about kids.
I think British should stay on their cold island called UK
I think every person who has criticized this article should go live in the UK. You would see this IS the way Brits joke! There is no offense in any word whatsoever.
You might not like the style it's written in(I don't), but the contents are as they would be if the Brits were talking about themselves, and it's funny! Brits are the masters of sarcasm. People have reacted to this article like extremists. Someone earlier on made a good point: you can only be offended if you really think you're not better than that.
Btw, I have lived 10 years in Eastern Europe, 15 in Spain and a very amazing 2 in the UK, where I hope to go back soon, and there is a percentage of people in Spain who take these things worryingly seriously. Stop telling everybody "go back to your country" and realize that every single one of these points makes Spain what it is: amazing. It's reactions like yours that spoil it for all the rest of us, who take this as a compliment to our country. Viva España y el Reino Unido, con su lluvia y todo ;)
Troy, you're a legend.LOL
I think the article was made, 'tongue in cheek' - that's a British expression for saying that although it has a base of truth in it, it was meant to be taken in a humorous and affectionate way.
..............................................
www.spanishlanguagesite.com/blog
Come on...Why do we, Spaniards, have to take ourselves that seriously and be so sensitive. It is obvious that the authors wrote this book in good spirit or else they would not being living in Spain for as long as they have.
I have been in the UK and I feel sorry for you, if you think that Spain is like you say, you must go back to your country right away,you will never be happy here, you can't be that bored in Spain and the heat might get you,you must miss the rain,so go back to you country and let us leave our way.This a not a to be taking humorous.
i think you all are just a bunch of idiots that havent got anything to do.
I am from Spain I find this humorous and true.
Take a chill pill people, it is an opinion- don't be so offended. We all make fun of something and if you can take humor go and read Nietche.
From the reactions i see from some of the Spanish people on this article, it kind of reaffirm what i read from an article before this, that Spanish people can't take criticsm, take things personally, and emotional. Well, there's nothing wrong with this of course, it's just a choice of how they choose to perceive things. Anyway, openness to outsider's perspective could be beneficial though, for improvement at least.
Hi:
I think that English people are prone to making stereotypes about Spain in that same superficial way Spanish people do about the rest of the world. Funny thing, but the English have many things in common with the Spanish, and coming from an Italian, this is interesting and strangely impartial. What do they have in common?
1.they both love beer, yes one likes it hot the other cold, but the essence is the same. (how strangely germanic of the Spaniards, eh? They are the only 'mediterraneans' who could outdrink a british person)
2.they both love everything fried, fried fried (healthy food? I don't see it here in Spain or in the UK, honestly!) Pescaito, fish and chips, one face one race (sorry guys)
3 they both (English and Spanish) get angry if you cut in line or if you do not serve them immediately (check out Spaniards or British in Italy, boy do they get nervous with our italian ways, you guys are sooo impatient!!! Not everything is quick tapas and beer pints and efficiency my friends!)
4 cannot have fun without drinking! Go see the Spanish in Lavapies in Madrid, pissing the night away, or the Brits along the coast...hmmm there might be a reason they come here...common drinking culture perhaps?
5 Spaniards and British love meat, that is all they eat in fact. Of course, in Spain it is a little better.
6 Both are supremely nationalistic, in that funny way, sensitive and pissy (example, Catalonians and Scottish, Welsh and Basque....hahha wow, SOOO different, I thought they were different species--->sarcastic voice here) etc... You are all Brits and Spanish to the rest of the world, despite such "IMMENSE" (hahahaha) differences between these regions.
7 both Brits and Spaniards are heirs to long, lost, dead colonies and empires, oh wait! The Spaniards complain about Gibraltar...and the Moroccans complain about Melilla and Ceuta. I think everyone has a point: if you want people to leave your country, leave others' alone too! Sad ex-colonizers, now only live on past glories. hahah. Look at who you are now.
8 both Spain and Britain were part of the Roman empire, who not only taught both of you barbarians how to read, write (we are using the latin alphabet as we speak), but also how to build roads, aqueducts, baths (although some use them more than others, ha!), and law. The list of course could go on. Come to Italy, silly English and Spanish, stop eating fried foods and drinking pints and cañas, and learn about your origins for once! You are two faces of the same coin, Spain and England, and the fact that you are so antagonistic proves it to me.
I could go on but my hand is tired and this is silly enough. Everyone needs to take a chill pill, and when you people write a book about stereotypes, look at yourselves and then write. Also, think about the larger context and you will find out that you are SOOOO alike, it's not even funny!
the moral of the story to these dear Spanglo-Brit-Spaniards (same thing): GROW UP!
You are both so envious of each other, for different reasons.
Grazie e arrivederci
As an American (okay, norteamericano...) I have to say I am pleased to see that PC (politically correct) attitudes are becoming universal. How did we ever manage to get along before?!
So much negative reaction to this funny advice article! To you Spaniards who find this article offensive, I would say, chill-out!. The British are masters of self-deprecating ironic humor (aka humour) and unless you understand the subtilties of their manner of speaking, you won't get it. Even Americans often have trouble "getting it" when some Brit cracks wise.
You also hve to understand the English never like anybody in general but every one specifically. If you ask them about the Americans, the French (okay bad choice) the Spanish, the Scots, the Germans...yada, yada, yada, they will hrump and say something under their breath, yet, they never met one they didn't like. Despite themselves, they really like other cultures and people.
this didnt help at all!
!!BENVINGUTS A CATALUNYA!!!BIENVENIDOS A ESPAÑA!!
i like balls
you have also forgotten the racism here against enybody whos not spanish. I have lived here now 9 years i came when i was 12 and from the first day in school i was called ingles de mierda (english shit) until i did some thing about it. and for those 9 years i have seen the way they have insulted black or halfcast people calling them negros de mierda o negratas (black shit or nigga) with indifference of where they were from it was there skin color. foreigners even better that means they can insult you with out you even noticing and ive seen it more than a hundred times and this is throughout spain.
i love spain i love the people but the majority of people here a racist and always will be look at what the americans had as a warning when coming to spain that there racist. but they took that down when Michelle Obama went to marbella on holiday.
me encanta españa y ablo perfecta mente el castellano si alguien kiere contestarme en español.
Is it possible to cheat on taxes in Spain and how?
Am forigner who spent several years in Spain
Soy de Sevilla, pero he pasado los uttimos 5 años en Francia. Ahora me dirijo a Canterbury para estudiar durante un año, y quien sabe, si me gusta me quede por una temporada. Yendo al grano, creo que tendemos a tomarnos las bromas sobre "nosotros" demasiado personales. Debemos aprender a reirnos con este tipo de chistes, pues en definitiva estan hechos para eso.
Hola Kim
"me encanta españa y ablo perfecta mente el castellano si alguien kiere contestarme en español"
Ahora que "ablas" el catellano "perfecta mente" aprende a escribir si "kieres"
Good evening: BUENAS TARDES
Well said but you forgot a couple: 1) Always smile and say hello this is not England people are friendly, well they are here 2) Remember why you came here. But seriously the above is a good assessment of how things are. Make Spanish friends and you will be fine and have a lot of laughs. However, remember this is their country and their customs join in and enjoy or stay outside and be miserable the choice is yours.
Oh yes and I forgot. Espaniss! Not all the English are like that IF you look beyond the drunks you will find a lot like us. Retired here because we LIKE the people, we LIKE Spain, but more important, at least to us we are away from the sort of people you talk about. I am retired and an author and here in Catalunia I have found peace to write, live and relax the basic truth is this: if you abide by the laws of the country that is fine, if you do not like their customs dont attend them or leave. It is that simple, but remember there are good and bad sides to ALL countries, so please do not judge us all along the lines you have set out.
I hugely enjoyed the 10 comments and having lived here for 8 years, agree with every word and more! Well said and well done!
I adore Spain. I go whenever I can. But one of the reasons I left was due to
1Everyone shouting - especially kids with their parents doing nothng to make them be quieter
2Pickpockets in Barcelona (but thats for another day)
but mainly 3 everyone being so into their region / country and habits...
and People getting so angry about silly details like the obviously oversimplified tongue in cheek comment to start here. I was always amazed why it was important to so many Spaniards what we thought of them! Por que molesta tanto que hay gente que piensa que los espanoles son todos toros y flamenco..? Por que importa??
Anyway very happy in France but do miss Spain every day..
I LOVE THIS - bold and so true.
But one thing is for sure, the wonderful women you meet in Spain will positively mark your life and heart - and will be your friend forever. I only llived there a little over 2yrs, have been gone about 18 months, and it feels like yesterday. Not moment passes that, despite all the above, when I don't wish that I was living right back there on Plaza de las Cortes 3! XOXO, Suzette in Wash DC/VA. ;-) suzette.manduley@gmail.com
Hector was very right.
1.English drive on a wrong side.
2.Their food is made for premature death from cholesterol.
3.Weather is s....
4.People are slow,non puctual,liars.
5.For some reason germans dosent want to stay in hotels where english are staying:)
As an Irish person with a very good friend from Spain, I can say he would definitely see the funny side of this article. If the authors had said "Spain is perfect in every way - the end" no one would believe it. Only countries like North Korea make statements like this.
this is a guide to liing on the coast as a fat lazy babyboomer with al the money and time in the world. If you don't scratc below the surface you will never understand a different way of life. FIRSTLY, has it ever occured to the british that mayby THEY are the odd ones out?...mmm??....the bit aout noisy children saidit all really. why do the british have children if they find them annoying? why not just clone yourselves in labs? the idea that the spanish are a seperate race could only be dreamed up by flag waving little-englanders. WE are ALL ...EUROPEANS. end of. Its just that the british are "odd".
it sound the same as living in miami.
Expatica's Getting Started section will provide practical information on how you can open a bank account, exchange your driving licence, improve your Spanish, and more.
Here's a guide to an extensive list of groups and clubs in Madrid for expats, from sports groups to social and family gatherings.
A brief introduction to our Tax section for Spain, from help with inheritance tax to accounting advice.
Here's a short introduction to our Banking section for those living in Spain, from what to ask the experts to opening a Spanish bank account.
Twitter
LinkedIn
Facebook
Flickr
110
