Expatica columnist Jacinta Nandi a.k.a Candi Girl details what's hot this month on the Berlin Spoken Word scene.

Happy New Year all! Hope everyone managed to avoid being blasted by vicious fireworks zooming out of people's bedroom windows and straight into your faces. We did--but only just.

So 2007 was a pretty exciting year for Berlin's English-language literary types in general and us kids at My English Class in particular. What were the highlights of the year? Erm, theatre shows at English Theatre Berlin, performing alongside Al Kennedy at the Saint George's Bookshop, a dazzling guest appearance at Exberliner's Kaffee Burger night: the year started off good and ended up astoundingly brilliant.

And December was undoubtedly the most exciting month so far. The launch of the third edition of Bordercrossing, Berlin's English-language literary magazine, a guest appearance of Sarah Lewis and her sister as Lewis Forever at Lady Gaby's Fuel and a decidedly messy third birthday party at everyone's favourite second-hand bookshop, East of Eden: we thought the month couldn't get much better. But that was until we went to Gallery Wallywoods for Paradox Paul's Poetry Slang night. Granted, it was a fairly chaotic event but it was definitely worth it, if just for the fun of seeing Ben getting changed into his Smurf costume three hours early and proceeding to "work the room" in this state. The moment he was asked why he was wearing his pyjamas is one the best moments of my entire life: His retort, "I am not wearing my pyjamas--I am dressed up like a Smurf" was so perfect, I bet Oscar Wilde is turning in his grave, desperately wishing he could have lived long enough to come up with that himself.

So, what's happening next year? First off, My English Class's New Year's Resolutions: Tired of his square image, James is resolving to be more rock 'n' roll. I bet you didn't think that was possible but he's gone leather trouser shopping already. On the other hand, I am totally gonna lose six kilos, be a better mother and improve my German. Meanwhile, Ben is intending to stop abusing under-age macaque monkeys and Jörg, ever the philistine, doesn't have any New Year's Resolutions. When asked why he replied, "the sun will rise again"--which probably passes for wisdom down in rural Schwabia.

And what's going on next month? Come on kids, make sure you check out the following events:

Jan. 17: 21:00 – Beatstreet at Hazelwood, Chorinerstr., 72, Mitte.

If it's poetry you want, then head on down to these guys for poetry from Robert Grant, Lady Gaby and a special guest.

Or if it's comedy you're after, then come along and say hi to Jacinta Nandi, Ben Knight, James Harris and Jörg Kaier. Because, after all, as Ben is always reminding us, we are basically the raunchiest language lesson you're ever likely to have outside a Polish brothel. And really he would know. With, as guests, some of Britain's funniest students...

Jan. 18: 20.30 – Night of a Thousand Comedians, Dodohaus, Huttenstr. 30 Berlin

The same students will be getting an evening all to themselves at Moabit's tiny and charming Dodohaus. This annual event gives the students a of Southampton Solent's world-first BA in Comedy Writing and Performance the chance to perform before a hardened Berlin audience... and with at least 15 students performing for an entrance price of €3.50, it promises to be the best value night of the month!

Jan. 21: 20:00 – Henry Rollins at Passionskirche, Marheinkeplatz 1, Kreuzberg.

Henry Rollins will be talking and talking and talking and talking: politics and poetry and punk. How exciting is that? Be there if you dare.

The My English Class team will bring you a musical that will stretch the genre of zero-budget science fiction to its limits--and beyond. Starring Ben Knight and Jacinta Nandi, and a fleeting cameo appearance from Bordercrossing's Fiona Mizani as a seductive alien. I don't know about you but I can't wait.

The first international outing for Brighton's Treason Show kids – a "savagely funny-fantastically silly" comedy sketch show. With Monty Python's Carol Cleveland! We can only say wow.

If you are not all sci-fi'd out, then what about this science fiction parable, set in an on-line police state a hundred years in the future? I've not actually checked this play out myself yet but sources inform me that there's a bit of gratuitous nudity in it, and I don't know about you, but I find there's nothing like a bit of gratuitous nudity for making me forget I'm actually watching a play.

Is that not enough for you English-language literary types? I mean, you could always go and learn some German then. Or, if you can't be bothered, then you could always check out this month's Wednesday at Kaffee Burger, Torstr. 58, Mitte, Jan. 30, featuring Robin Alexander, their old political correspondent, reading from his newly translated book on parenthood, "Families for Beginners."

And if you fancy reading something out yourself, then pop along to Stories in Colour, at Gallery Wallywoods, Berliner Allee 125, every Thursday in January, starting at 21:00, or Art Pub, Christinen Str. 31, every Monday night at 21:00.

Well after all that I'd better go and have a little lie-down now. See you next month, kids!

Jacinta's blog is at: www.myspace.com/myenglishclass

11 January 2008

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