Sun, 22 November 2009
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Jacinta Nandi-Pietschmann a.k.a. Candi Girl is told to leave Berlin and details what's on in Berlin this month."You know what I hate," he asked fiercely. "I hate the way we all wank each other off. All the English-language people. Oh, my God. We all sit together in a darkened room, like bloody mushrooms, wanking and wanking and wanking and wanking. Yuck. Oh, you’re so talented, and he’s so talented, and she’s so talented, and I’m so talented, and we’re so talented, and oh my God, we are so bloody talented. ‘I know so many talented people!’ I just wanna puke up whenever I hear that sentence. ‘I know so many talented people!’ You know so many wankers, I wanna say. You know so many wankers, that’s what you know."
"Yea but we can’t just sit around telling each other how untalented we are," I objected, conscientiously. "That wouldn’t be a fun conversation."
"You should go to London, Jacinta," he said to me, ominously, venomously. "You’ll never get out of here if you stay. And you actually have talent – like a bit, you know. I’m not actually just saying that. Though I could be. But if you don’t go to London, you’ll never know. You’ve got to get out here and find out the truth."
"But I like it in Berlin," I said, feebly.
"What, exactly, do you like?"
"I like the kindergartens, for a start."
He winced. "Yeah, I know," he said. "My friend’s daughter has her kid in daycare in London and it’s just not payable. Yeah, I was forgetting you had a kid. You had better stay for a few years yet."
"Okay," I said.
"You’re really talented, you know, Jacinta," he said then, shaking his head sadly, instead of goodbye.
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