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You are here: Home Leisure Arts & Culture Cinema: Bloodsuckers vamping it up for suckers?

09/07/2009Cinema: Bloodsuckers vamping it up for suckers?

Vampires – they keep coming back, don’t they? Picturenose’s James Drew offers his thoughts on two new nosferatu nightmares.

Blood: The Last Vampire (2009)
The vampire of old has certainly been given a makeover of late, with coffin-dwelling, garlic and crucifix-fearing beasties giving way to pretty-boys (Twilight), SFX zombies (I Am Legend (2007)), or punching bags for homicidal beauties in sexy gear (Underworld). Blood: The Last Vampire (2009) is unfortunately an irritating, largely pointless addition to the last category.
 
This live-action version of what originally began life as a 50-minute Japanese animated feature (which in turn spawned numerous comic-book sequels) was originally intended to be under the helmsmanship of Ronny Yu (The 51st State (2001)), but it eventually went to French commercials and music videos director Chris Nahon (Kiss of the Dragon (2001)), with Chris Chow (Huo Yuan Jia (2006)) providing the script.
 
Blood: The Last Vampire
 
South Korean actress Jeon Ji-hyun plays Saya, a sword-wielding demon-slayer in 1970s Japan who is eternally 16 and, surprise surprise, perpetually clad in school uniform. Hmmm. Her half-vampire DNA gives her the speed and strength necessary to terminate her monstrous brethren on behalf of the Council, a secret society dedicated to protecting humanity from the threat of extinction at the hands of boss demon Onigen (played by Koyuki, who was Tom Cruise’s love interest in The Last Samurai (2003)). 
 
It’s unconvincing, poorly dubbed, and even the fight sequences seem tacked on. Dull, dull, dull. A sequel looks possible – there’s a scary thought. 
 
91 mins.

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