Sun, 27 May 2012
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Expat expert Robin Pascoe discusses the pitfalls of over-parenting and its effect on Third Culture Kids.It’s hard these days to pick up a parenting book, magazine, or website offering advice about raising children without stumbling upon the term ‘helicopter parenting’. What exactly does it mean anyway?
“It’s a term applied to parents who are over-managing, over-scheduling, and generally over-protecting their children,” I wrote in my 2006 book “Raising Global Nomads: Parenting Abroad in an On-Demand World”. In other words, some parents are hovering like a helicopter over their kids, possibly disabling them from forging their own independent lives.
While this kind of over-parenting is now rampant in the world in general, it can have more specific ramifications in the expat world.
"If a parent’s natural impulses around their children are to worry, hover, and discourage a child’s natural movement toward greater independence, those tendencies will likely also become exaggerated when adjusting to life overseas,” says Seattle-based therapist Josh Sandoz who just created a website International Therapist Directory to assist families abroad in finding proper counseling.
Having worked extensively with Third Culture Kids and their families, Sandoz believes that patterns of overly fretful TCK parenting tend to “maximize the challenges of the TCK experience while simultaneously minimizing the benefits.”
“In the end, the child suffers,” says the consultant, adding that some children have been known to pay someone else to do their homework because of the pressure they feel from their parents.
Want to move to Germany but haven’t figured out the details? Check out Expatica’s overview of the German permit system.
In part one of our two part series, we cover the driving culture in Berlin, where to park and buy gas and, most importantly, the laws.
Our comprehensive guide includes information on how to find work, recruitment agencies, employment contracts and labour law.
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